MOTO NGANTOK BLOG

OK, I admit it. I miss “Glee.” It has been gone for so long now. It’s been three whole months and there are still more than three weeks until it’s back. Sure, there were fun “Glee” diversions this summer. Dianna Agron wore that T-shirt that made the world (i.e. every single tumblesbian) explode. Naya Rivera and Heather Morris shared an on-stage kiss. The “Glee” movie bombed – despite the glory that was Heather and Naya gyrating in 3D. And we learned that basically the entire cast was definitely leaving after this season, or definitely not leaving, or getting a spin-off, or never getting a spin-off. In other words, same Ryan Murphy, different shit.



Since they released the first new promo for Season 3,I’ve felt the pang. I miss those adorable Glee kids, I really do. I have no idea what this season will bring. If the addition of the show’s first real writing staff (including two real, live women – one a lesbian even) will make a difference for the better. We can only hope that it does. But regardless, what I miss are the actors and their characters themselves. What is indisputably the hardest-working cast in Hollywood (they sing, they dance, they act, they go on tour) is what makes the show for me. And, of course, The Gay. Man, I miss The Gay. Give us Brittana and Faberry, Season 3, or give us a death by slushie. Though, even if they don’t, there are always the shipper vids. We love you, shipper vids.





p.s. Murder is bad. But Google sure is helpful.

Confirmed: Hope Solo will be on the new season of “Dancing with the Stars.” Also confirmed: Many, many more lesbians are going to watch the new season of “Dancing with the Stars.”



So the world’s most kick-ass goalie is going to be on the show with the shiny sequins and the crazy choreography. On the one hand, wow, guess this means I’m going to have to start watching “Dancing with the Stars.” On the other hand, dammit, guess this means I’m going to have to start watching “Dancing with the Stars.”



I do not watch, though I have caught a few performances over the years. What I’ve gleaned from those few minutes is that, um, isn’t Hope a little upscale for this show? Let’s be brutally honest, it’s usually people trying to revive their careers or people without real careers in the first place. I mean, Rob Kardashian and George Clooney’s ex-girlfriend are both on the show this season. Don’t get me wrong, I like Chaz Bono and Ricki Lake and Carson Kressley and mean them no disrespect as fellow castmates. But then there’s the little problem of Nancy Grace also being a contestant. I’m not sure I can in good conscience watch any show that features that woman. She makes me want to kill someone and get away with it, just to watch her head explode. (Just kidding, I do not want to kill anyone. But I do want kind of want to watch Nancy’s head explode.)



Then there’s the injury factor. Aren’t contestants getting hurt left and right every season on this show? Hope, girl, the 2012 London Olympics are less than a year away. We do not want to have our star goalie sidelined by a tragic cha-cha accident.



Man, I am being so gay about this news. I’ve processed like 100 emotions in four paragraphs. But in the end, I think I’m mostly happy Hope will get the exposure and hopefully it’ll shine more much-deserved light onto our amazing U.S. Women’s National Team. As Hope herself tweeted, it’s to raise awareness of women’s soccer. And that’s a good thing. Also a good thing, this means I have a perfectly valid excuse to post more pictures of Hope Solo.



My, what big hands you have.

Admittedly, these legs are going to look killer in heels.

Normally I hate midriff-baring dresses. This is not normally.

If I was one of Hope’s DWTS competitors, I would seriously consider forfeiting after seeing this picture.

Arm…

…porn…

…forever.

I take everything I said back. This is the best news ever. Also, DWTS costumers, please note that Hope should only ever appear in sleeveless gowns. That’s an order. It would be a sin to cover even a single centimeter of these guns. A sin against hotness.

We’re here, we’re queer, we’re Ezbian lovers! If you love “Pretty Little Liars.” Or if you love Anne Shirley and therefore anyone who looks like Gilbert Blythe. Or if you just love really awesome T-shirts. Man, do I have the deal for you. My genius friend Heather Hogan has made the cast and crew of “Pretty Little Liars” fans of her equally genius recaps. And, as fans of the recaps, they’ve come to know her recap lingo. Risen Mitten = A. Boo Radley Van Cullen = Toby Cavanaugh. Ezbian = Ezra Fitz, the Gilbert Blythe doppelganger with lesbian tendencies. And, you might also come to know that the cast is really responsive to fans. So after Ian Harding, who plays Ezra, gave his stamp of approval to the “Ezbian” label, naturally, a call for a T-shirt suggesting such was made.

Ian and TV lesbian Shay Mitchell provided the action shot.

Heather provided the T-shirt design.

And, voila, the official “Ezbian Loves Lesbians” T-shirt was born.



Not only is it a kick-ass T-shirt, it’s a kick-ass T-shirt for a good cause. Heather is donating all proceeds to The Trevor Project.



Buy your very own T-shirt here. Well, what are you waiting for? Show you Ezbian pride, ladies and discerning gentlemen.



p.s. In case you’re hankering for some TV lesbian on TV lesbian interaction, please relive the most cotton-mouth inducing scene in “Pretty Little Liars” history. How Samara had enough saliva left to utter a single word after that display, I have no idea.

p.p.s. Who wants to draft Heather into starting a T-shirt business? Accepting petition signatures below.