MOTO NGANTOK BLOG: Farewell, Nanay

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Farewell, Nanay

Posted by st at 7:07 AM

Hey everyone! I've been kind of busy with school and my Gram's burial and all those shiznits. And I'm sorry.

Just a quick update.

Gram died Wednesday night, January 28. Mum and her siblings decided to take the life support off of her since the machine's the only thing that's keeping her alive. It was a tough decision for all of us, but it has to be done. I know we did the right thing. Gram had already suffered too much, it's finally time for her to rest.

We drove unusually slow on our way to the hospital. Somehow all of us were thinking that it might prolong Gram's life. And maybe, just maybe, she would suddenly wake up.

As I entered her room I could hear the muffled sobs of her children and sisters. I broke into endless cries of torment when they asked me to say goodbye to Gram. I was not yet ready to let go and give her up, but seeing her with all those tubes, you can't help but to finally surrender and give her back to God.

We played her favorite song, Tennessee Waltz by Patti Page, then they turned the machine off, and then Gram cried… for the last time.

OMG, I'm going to cry.

Gram's wake (Day 2)
January 29-31, 2009
Sanctuarium

A lot of people came. I didn't know Gram has touched so many lives. It was as if she was an actress or something. Seriously. Most of our relatives were there, but I didn't converse much with them since they always have this calculating look in their eyes. I don't like it.

Oh well… that's life!
Thank God the place has wi-fi!

Sanctuarium

Gram's guest book and pictures

BPI Staff

Loving wi-fi :)

Nanay :(

Flowers from GMD :)

Ainsley and I :)

Relatives etc.

Uncles

Ate Celeste and Ate Gayle || Auntie Letty and Mum
Dane . Me . Patrick || Tita Che . Rondell . Tito Del

Michael and Kyle -- I don't know who the other kid is

Gram's Wake (Day 3)

Kam and I with B, Ivan, and Miguel

CAMwhoring with KAM :)

Loving it :)

Kam playing drunk :|

Relatives etc.

Shali . Alyanna and Ate Ye

Tita Nette . Tito Rey

Nerdy Kam! Eeewww... creepy :|

KamDan

Gram's Burial (Part 1)
February 1, 'o9
Sanctuarium

I was putting on a brave face and was trying so hard not to cry, but Mum's eulogy got the best of me. What pained me the most was when James cried. I could not imagine a 3 year old boy crying for the loss of a loved one. There was even this time while we were walking and he asked me if we can go to heaven cuz he wanted to see Gram and talk to her… I couldn't answer him.

All us are deeply affected by her loss. I guess it would take time to let go of her, but maybe that will never happen. I just don't know how to live without her. I was very dependent on her. She was my second Mum… and now she's gone.