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Thursday, May 14, 2009
I can't say that I have been procrastinating all summer. I admit there were times when I would bum around the house all day long, but most of the time I'm simply doing chores, and trying to build a better and stronger relationship with my family, especially with my Mom. The only thing that I never really gave much of my attention to was my relationship with my boyfriend.
He was right; I have been too comfortable and confident that he would always be there for me no matter what. This summer, I've never given much thought on what he wants, what he needs, and what he feels. Don't get me wrong, I do miss him, and I love him more than anything. Problem is, I never make it a point to tell that to him. I never had the initiative to go out of the house and give him a surprise visit. Once he asked if we could go out, I said yes. The next day, I said I couldn't come. I know there was a valid reason for it, but I also know that that hurt him so much.
I am a very selfish and self-centered woman. I've never really thought of how much stress his job is causing him, and how much my presence could ease it.
So much for trying to be the perfect girlfriend.
Vacation is almost over and I hate myself for still not doing anything that would make him happy. I had all the time that I need all summer long, I never made good use of it. So right now, I've been regretting everything. Every little thing that I did all summer that made me not see him. The thought of time travel seems like a brilliant idea right now.
So B, if you get to read this…
I'M UTTERLY DEEPLY ENTIRELY SORRY…
SORRY FROM THE DEEPEST FIERY PITS OF MY HEART…
I love you.
He was right; I have been too comfortable and confident that he would always be there for me no matter what. This summer, I've never given much thought on what he wants, what he needs, and what he feels. Don't get me wrong, I do miss him, and I love him more than anything. Problem is, I never make it a point to tell that to him. I never had the initiative to go out of the house and give him a surprise visit. Once he asked if we could go out, I said yes. The next day, I said I couldn't come. I know there was a valid reason for it, but I also know that that hurt him so much.
I am a very selfish and self-centered woman. I've never really thought of how much stress his job is causing him, and how much my presence could ease it.
So much for trying to be the perfect girlfriend.
Vacation is almost over and I hate myself for still not doing anything that would make him happy. I had all the time that I need all summer long, I never made good use of it. So right now, I've been regretting everything. Every little thing that I did all summer that made me not see him. The thought of time travel seems like a brilliant idea right now.
So B, if you get to read this…
I'M UTTERLY DEEPLY ENTIRELY SORRY…
SORRY FROM THE DEEPEST FIERY PITS OF MY HEART…
I love you.
Don't forget to smile! :)
-XOXO-
-XOXO-
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